The Other Side of Failing

When my friend Sara and I were revamping the website from heathersblessedjourney.com to heathermeadows.com we also reworked the tag line.

Changing the name of the website was going to lose the emphasis placed on the “RN” in jouRNey, but it was still my hope to reflect my work as a nurse somewhere in the new tag line.

We met the goal with two words: “little doses.” It’s a subtle hint most may not even see.   But here’s the story behind it. As a NICU nurse, the amount of medication I administer to my tiny, tiny patients is quite small. Too much is harmful, but those itty-bitty doses achieve great things in their bodies.

That is what I wanted this place to be. A place where you can pop in for a few minutes and grab a little dose of something good. My heartbeat was to inject small amounts of inspiration, joy, strength and encouragement from my life moments into yours.

This last week I received more than a “little dose” from a life moment with my daughter.

Let me give a short back-story.

There was a mother and daughter who had a beautiful relationship. But then, something changed. It started with an “H” and ended with “ormones”! It was NOT pretty! This change brought out the worst, most ugly, dark sides of both the mother and daughter. If it had been a marriage, I’m most certain divorce court would have been considered, but parent/child relationships face the good, the bad and the ugly and sometimes have to just hang on for dear life.

Yes. That’s our story. That’s Brooklyn and me. I’ll share more about the season in the book I’m writing, but for now, I want to share with you one of the scriptures I stood on in those dark moments.

Galatians 6:9 NLT So let’s not get tired of doing what is good. At just the right time we will reap a harvest of blessing if we don’t give up.

I’m not proclaiming there won’t be any more bumps in the road, but I am sharing that when everything hit the fan, when doors were slamming, drinks were tossing, and voices yelling, I’d stand on this scripture as if on a mountain and quote it at the top of my lungs. We got tired. We were wore out. We got discouraged. We were disheartened, disappointed and dismayed at times, but—we would not give up.

“…..a harvest of blessing IF we don’t give up.”

The day the Lord so faithfully brought our baby girl into this world, He had every intention of her life being a blessing. Not just for her parents, but for herself and for Him. We weren’t giving up on that.

And what a blessing she was to me this last week. Watching Galatians 6:9 at work in her own personal life injected an incredibly special dose of inspiration, joy, strength and encouragement into my heart.

Brooklyn’s half birthday fell on Sunday, September 4th. Labor Day on Monday pushed Brooklyn back in being able to test for her driver’s permit to Tuesday. She wanted to be the first in line when they opened. We got up on Tuesday at 5am, left the house at 6am and pulled in the parking lot at 6:33am to line up for the 7am opening. Brooklyn was seventh in line.

I stood, waiting excitedly for her to complete her test knowing that she’d get her paper signed and off to the tag agency we’d go for her permit. Well, she didn’t pass.

A bit taken aback, she declared that we aren’t the type of people who quit in the face of failure and that she wanted to try again the next day. Super proud parent moment.

So. There you have it. We got up Wednesday morning, a smidge bit earlier at 4:30am, left the house at 5:30am, and we arrived an hour before opening, putting us third in line. We checked in and the agent asked Brooklyn, “Did they tell you about the skip button?” Brooklyn said, “No.” The agent informed, “If you don’t know the answer to a question, you can hit ‘skip’. If it’s a question you need it will come back around, but it may not come back at all.” Awesome!

I took a seat over by the door on the bench. Brooklyn completed the test and walked around the corner. I whispered, “How’d it go?” She shook her head. I responded quietly and compassionately, “What?”

We’re doing a parent-taught driving course, so I knew she knew the information to pass the test. We got in the car and before I could ask a question the floodgates opened. Whoa! Emotion! Hold the phone!

In borderline hysteria she proceeded to express all the inadequacies attached to that test. I was sifting through my mental rolodex of encouraging words, when she revealed, “And when I checked back in with the lady, she asked me why I didn’t skip any of the questions but I just thought I could answer them without having to!!!”

“Wait. What?” I couldn’t believe she didn’t take the lady’s advice and skip the questions. Not one!   This shifted our conversation from the topic of intellect to the issue of pride. Was she too prideful to humble herself in admitting that she possibly didn’t have all the answers to every question? Hmm.

The girl made it back before school started and I anticipated the possibility that she may just want to push it off for a few days to review. Maybe she’d want to go ahead and miss school for an afternoon testing time. Some of us just can’t think when the sun is barely up.

Nevertheless, I wasn’t surprised when I picked her up from school and she decided to go back on Thursday, for the third day in a row, before the crack of dawn to try again. Nope. I wasn’t shocked. Galatians 6:9 was at work within her. She was gonna reap a blessing cause she wasn’t gonna give up!

So up we were again, in the dark of the morning, headed in for round three reviewing the blessing of the “skip” button! In the true ironies of life, I got pulled over for doing around or about 75 in a 65. Let me tell you about grace. The Lord must have sprinkled our car with the pixie dust of His favor because that officer gave me a warning on no account of my own. Although I’m a talker, I don’t say too much when flashing lights, a uniform and handcuffs accompany the individual. What a story for Brooklyn to tell her kids one day.

Brooklyn checked in, was humble, raw and transparent with the agent and confirmed what she needed to know to approach this test. “Ma’am, this is my third time here.” (Which honestly, the lady already knew. By this point we felt maybe we should add the two Department of Public Safety agents to our Christmas card list). Brooklyn expressed her understanding of the skip button wanting to make sure it would not penalize her for the number of times she hit it. Then Brooklyn went over to take her test. At this point I headed out to the car, where she and I had agreed to meet.

I sat in the car with a small view of Brooklyn standing at the voting-booth-style computer. I prayed for her. “Lord, You created her innermost being. You stitched her together. I pray You speak Your peace, calmness and confidence from the top of her head to the sole of her feet. Let her know You have equipped her for success. Give her assurance.” And on and on I prayed.

I watched as she walked back over to the lady, had an exchange that I couldn’t see and proceeded out to the car. I got out of the car and there she did it—a thumbs up! I may have gotten overly excited. Oh, who am I kidding?! I totally got overly excited and she and I hugged and jumped like giddy girls in the parking lot of the DPS!

Brooklyn said that when she went back to the agent to get her paper signed, the lady exclaimed, for all to hear, “You passed!!!” And she only skipped two questions, not missing any! The agent was so happy for Brooklyn!

“…..a harvest of blessing IF we don’t give up.”

I know Brooklyn contemplated canning the whole idea. I know because in her despair of failing the second time she expressed those very thoughts. But we all know that’s not even a logical option. She’d have to pass it at some point in her life.

The question for us to consider though is: How many blessings have we missed out on because we gave up?

I can’t recall how many times I’ve said, “Just forget it!” or “I’m done!” or “I quit!” Sometimes our emotions make us completely illogical. Exactly the reason we don’t make important decisions when we’re super emotional. In those times, this Voice inside me says, “Heather, don’t give up. I have good things in store for you. Believe. Persevere. Press in.”

The Lord whispers that truth to all of us. Our challenges may look a little different but we’ve all got them, and there is a blessing tucked inside each and every one we overcome!

Thank you for spending some time allowing me to share this life moment with you! Please take it for the little dose of inspiration, joy, strength and encouragement it has tucked into it.

Bless you!

*side note- thankful my girl wanted me to share this story for whomever it could encourage.

****We need you to make this post what it needs to be. Three ways to help—sharecommentsubscribe. Please help us grow. We can’t do it without you.****
Connect with Us! Click Here to Subscribe
Could our story be of benefit for your group or upcoming event?  Click here to contact us!
Choose this link to see a video of our story

Held On for Sweet Success!!!!

 

13 thoughts on “The Other Side of Failing

  1. Yay Brooklyn!!!!

    Heather – your words always speak to my spirit. Your small dose was so timely. More than I can express here.

    Jackie

  2. Oh wow Heather. This one is close to home. “But we all know that’s not even a logical option. She’d have to pass it at some point in her life.” It may not be a logical option, but fear isn’t always logical! I’m 38 and have avoided driving all my life. Oh sure, I did the expected drivers ed in highschool and even had my beginners licence a few times (in Ontario there is a long convoluted and expensive process to getting your full licence). I’ve now passed my third written test and have yet to pass a driving test. I just freeze up behind the wheel. I get shaky and have cold sweats. (I think I’m doing the world a favour by not driving!) I said I’d get my licence while I was in university. Then it was before I got married. Then it was before I had kids. Then it was before my kids started school. Now both my kids are in school and I still can’t drive. Not being able to drive is debilitating – to myself and to my family! I don’t know how to get past the fear.

    • Sarah- I cannot thank you enough for your post here. Bless you for sharing with me.
      The 2nd day we were waiting for the DPS to open a girl was sitting on the other side of Brooklyn. Brooklyn was reviewing her book during our hour wait. Several times the girl said, “It’s not that big a deal. It’s easy. You’ll pass.” I know the girl had good intentions but she had limited knowledge. She didn’t know that it was Brooklyn’s 2nd time, and that for some people it may not be that easy. Her words were meant to encourage but accomplished the opposite.
      I want you to know that I admire you so very much for sharing this struggle with me. And you’ve already done the biggest part- identifying the culprit– fear.
      I could write another post- just on that alone.
      At home, I keep a quote and a scripture on our fridge at all times. But I’ve got way more scribbled on notes of my own. It’s my weapon to fight whatever I’m battling.
      I encourage you to SPEAK OUT LOUD:
      #1 prayers asking the Lord to help you overcome this challenge.
      #2 stand on a scripture. I’m thinking of many but here’s just one – Philippians 4:13 I can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens me. Speak it out in the face of fear, self-doubt and inadequacy.
      #3 keep a quote close by “I learned that COURAGE was not the absence of fear, but the TRIUMP over it. The brave man is not who does not feel afraid, but he who CONQUERS that fear.” Nelson Mandela
      You can do all things, Sarah!
      Don’t give up.
      Bless you! Bless you! Bless you!!!
      ❤️

  3. Way to Go Brooklynn !! If it makes you feel better Jordan also failed his first two times & was also very discouraged. I’m pretty sure God was tugging at him to not get lost in the hype of not passing but living in the fact that he knew he could do it. God Bless guys & Congratulations again Brooklynn !!

    • Yes! So true! Brooklyn said that being open about it she realized how many of her peers had to take the test more than once too! There is so much comfort and encouragement in the imperfections and humanity inside each of us. Thanks so much for sharing!!! ❤️

  4. Pingback: Redefine a Fall

  5. Pingback: What’s In This Box? The Meadows Merry Christmas to You!

  6. Pingback: FakeBooking: Living Real in a Social Media World

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s